2oo9.

ohh how i can't wait for 2oo9 to bring its greatness !!

i really and truly feel that i am maturing in my relationship with the Lord. You don't understand its just a sigh of relief to be on the right side of things for once and truly mean it. Now don't get me wrong i've never been the one to smoke, drink, and have sex, but i still wasnt living and acting the way the Lord would want me too.

I finally feel like there isnt a decision to debate this is about my purpose with the Lord. I cant even explain the mistakes i've made and felt absolutely awful about it and still did it because i felt like who cares, who do i have to prove myself to ? w r o n g !

I've always had great examples in front of me, prefect ? no ! just a w e s o m e ! i have two very special best friends that i have always seen put there utmost trust in God, even with all the things that went wrong or even just petty drama in their life they always knew where to turn and i envyed the fact that there decision was never second guessed HE was the answer, the advisor, the bottomline period and there no way around it !

I wondered why i couldnt have the relationship and i was so busy wondering why my relationship with him couldnt be like Brit's or Dana's, and not realizing it started with me HIS relationship with me personally was going to be different than anyone elses, my problems, issues, hardships were different than everybody elses so how can our relationship possibly be the same as others.

I finally realize, because its never too late to look back over your life and see what he has really done for you and finally just say a simple thank you ! because thats all HE wants HE just wants to know that you acknowledge HIM some how or some way !! and i think to myself just how grateful i am and i cant believe that they're could be someone soo loving so caring, sooo forgiving, cause i have said sorry so many times and turned around and made the same mistake and yet and still HE was by my side aiding in my next struggle.


i love you Lord sooooo much !! and i am grateful to have you in my life, by my side, as a friend, a family member everything ! thank you and i cant wait for the success and greatness that awaits me in 2oo9. =)